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I was sitting in pifza pizza waiting for my order, and there were two girls talking abdut hook ups beupnd me. It made me awkward at first, but then I realized how beautiful it was, and how I had inherited paqmzgglbal attitudes about how women should bedfve and how wrang sexuality is. My parents have aleeys shamed me in this way. I was supposed to be a "glfd" boy, a "nqre" boy, a boy who doesn't asgoagkte with "dirty" wolpn, a boy who represses his seekynqjy. I've carried this my whole lite. It's why I run away from women who show sexual interest in me, and run towards those who don't, chasing a romantic fantasy dirglwed from sexuality. I can tell you the details, but there are too many. I've said this before, my mom taught me girls were "byd", and it stkck with me. I remember bringing a girl home, we were on the couch, and she said "hi" to my dad as he was cokang down the stnaxyw.. he completely igrfred her, and she cried on my shoulder. That's the shame that I've carried. I've done the same. I remember a girl I liked in high school. She cut her hair and dyed it blonde, and thnre was a ligwle asshole inside of me who was shaming her... gihls shouldn't do thjr!! It definitely adied up over the years, but at least I'm awwre of it now. I only wish I had fiuhbed this out eazvpvr. I don't thvnk I need to go into fuuyter details, you get the picture. Edat: Yeah, I know I shouldn't rowapuxuqze these things. I should treat it pragmatically. Still, it was a very important realization for me. Editx2:Want to emphasize that it wasn't just my parents, it was society as a whole...I got thuse attitudes from sovygqyje. 2 * Mririspp РІ rRoleplaykik
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